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Thursday, August 30, 2012

In-Between-Ers

There are a few of us that are in a real weird season of in-betweens right now. Where you're kind of like, "hey, I have a lot going on!" while saying "hey, I feel like there is NOTHING going on in my life these days..." It's a weird place, let me tell you. 

But there is hope for us in-between-ers. We have come out of a season where so much learning has been done, and it is easy to jump right to regrets. Like, I regret not knowing what I know now back then. Or, I wish I had been shown just how to love people four years ago instead of just in the last few months. 

But in reality, us in-between-ers are being prepared. We have been shown, we have learned the hard way, and we have been made aware of things that our age and our pride try to keep us from seeing. But by the grace of God, we have been shown

Do you know someone who is in an in-between season of life right now? 

Remind them that our God is one of purpose and direction, and that even when we may feel like we are dilly-dallying the days away, He is at work. 

Do you know my old roommate, Kayla? She's great. She got married this summer, so she is looking at this in-between season from a little bit of a different perspective than I am, but it is a GOOD one. Check out her blog, it's a keeper. A cute keeper. 

She has been wrestling through 1st Peter 2:9 recently, and we got to have some real good discussion over that passage and some good wine last night. 

"But you are a chosen race, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people for his own possession, that you may proclaim the excellencies of him who called you out of darkness into his marvelous light." 1 Peter 2:9

Excellencies. The excellencies of God. I don't know that I can even digest all that that word entails. 

We've been called out of darkness into a marvelous light. 

If we are to dwell in the light, may we always keep a constant awareness of the darkness and He who called us out of it, and proclaim constantly the glories of His name. 

Tuesday, August 28, 2012

Tuesday Night Ramblings

Yesterday was challenging. It was a blessing to get to catch up with a teammate, and discuss the possibilities of what next summer may look like for the two of us. It was a delicate balance between getting caught up in planning and day-dreaming, and being in touch with reality and what is going on in front of me. I'm overwhelmed.

All I know is that I would give almost anything to be able to be in Kathmandu tonight. I would love to just be there. I don't like that there are two days of traveling between me and that place. 

It is good to be able to seek the Lord and what He has for the future, but it is so hard to then bounce back from those conversations and be completely content with where He has me. 

My class on the Biology of Cancer finishes this week. It's crunch time. 

Back to the Bay Area this weekend or beginning of next week. 

It's been wonderful to catch up with friends, and tell them about this summer and this year. It's been hard to tell them about Nepal, but it has been a great blessing to have peers that are so eager to hear everything, both the fun and the hard things. 

Join me in praying for our world tonight. For the places with such basic, visible need. And for the places that want not for survival, but need so much of Jesus. 





Happy Birthday BFF

Here's to you, my wise friend, Kim.

You've been the greatest over the years.

Miss ya.




Monday, August 27, 2012

The Icarus Account

Check this brother-band out. They are absolutely wonderful.

PureVolume is currently streaming their whole new album that has yet to be released.

Head here to check it out!

I personally recommend "Too Young For This Love".

And all the others.

Sunday, August 26, 2012

The Digital Age

Check out The Digital Age.

They are David Crowder Band, minus David Crowder.

Not that I have anything against David Crowder, but his band is pretty darn fantastic.


Sunday

"Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, the she might be holy and without blemish." 
Ephesians 5:25-27

Saturday, August 25, 2012

Rad

I miss these chicks.

Bachelorette Pad, 2012.

They're rad.


Social Media, Adieu

It has been around three weeks since I got rid of my most used application on my iPhone, which many of you are familiar with, called Instagram.

While in Nepal, I would occasionally sign onto Instagram when wifi was available, and post a picture of something we had done recently. But I didn't have the internet capabilities to scroll through my feed and look at what the rest of the world was doing.

I also had absolutely no interest in what the rest of the world was doing.

Who was drinking what at Starbucks.

What the weather was like in inland California.

Whose cute kids were wearing what.

Or what a sunset looked like over Lake Michigan.

Sorry to say it, but I had great things going on right in front of me.

People hearing of Jesus, girls being taken out of sexual slavery, playing soccer on dirt fields with very talented street boys, walking through downpours to visit those suffering in the government hospital, and even watching sunsets from the tops of hills that would kill any #skyparty I could ever partake in here.

It allowed me to be present.

To not worry about what was going on anywhere else but where God had me.

So when I returned home, I was conflicted as to whether to jump back on the Instagram train or not. So, I gave it a shot.

And I hated it.

Because guess what? There are absolutely splendid and wonderful things happening in front of me right here and now. Things just as wonderful as I saw in Nepal, but here I find that I have to look harder for them sometimes. I find myself needing to push aside my instinct to focus on materialism and fix my eyes solely on Jesus.

I want to be wholly present and completely invested in what is going on in front of me. Not staging pictures, constantly thinking of what would be a great way to share with the world what I am doing.

I was not dwelling in what the Lord was placing in front of me

I let Instagram get between myself and Jesus.

And heck, so did Facebook.

So, they've both been gone for a few weeks now.

I have gotten rid of Facebook before, for almost four months last summer, and it was my absolute favorite summer. It allowed me to be at home, support my family through the craziest of seasons, and get more involved and in love with my small church.

They're gone and they're not coming back.

So I am sorry that my Nepal pictures are gone, I will put up some on this blog sometime soon.

But if you want to keep in touch, I want to see you in real life. I don't like the feeling that people can "keep up on my life" by creeping on my Facebook profile or my Instagram feed. I'd rather they have to text/call/e-mail/show up in order to be invested, because being invested in those around us means showing up.

Not creepin' around.

It's also a challenge to myself to reach out and show up in the lives of those I care for.

So, keep in touch, friends.

And not-friends.

Let's do life together.

Wednesday, August 22, 2012

Accepting Applications

I just want like, a butler.

That cooks for me, gets my iced coffees, does my laundry, drives me around, studies my coursework for me and heck, maybe even takes the tests for me. And when he is done doing the things that are absolutely necessary, like organizing my headbands, he can then bring my various iced beverages out to the pool.

I guess at that point he would become the pool boy.

Which I am totally fine with.

Then in the evenings, he would teach me to play beach volleyball, because I have no idea how to play, and help me perfect my flick of the frisbee.

At the end of the evening he would retire to his accessory living area outside of my yacht/house/estate, and would return in the morning to awaken me.

With the aforementioned iced coffee.

He would be the perfect balance of classy and hipster. None of this fancy suit business is required.

If you know anyone interested, I will be housesitting a beautiful, grandiose house in a wealthy neighborhood near Azusa for the rest of the week.

Auditions for the position will be held sometime on Saturday between the pool and the pottery-throwing room.

Those auditioning should be well-versed in my favorite wines, the amount of syrup I prefer in my iced coffee, and how I like my eggs.

A science-related degree would be appreciated. Preferably a doctorate.

Disclaimer: This post is somewhere between serious and joke-central. I'll let you decide exactly where on that scale it lies. 

Monday, August 20, 2012

Oh, the Crazy

I have been advised by my older friends to enjoy this period of life as much as possible, and to draw it out for as long as is comfortable.

But I am beginning to wonder if there is anything at all about this season that doesn't scream "this girls a little crazy."

I am a month from being 22.

I have no job.

My love/dating/relationship status is just so interesting. And by interesting I mean complicated. And by complicated I mean you probably won't be hearing anything about it until I'm engaged. And by engaged I mean years and years from now.

I am living for free.

I am two classes from being a college graduate.

I am moving back home for a few months, where I will also live for free.

I am likely to be spending more hours of this Fall volunteering than I am to be getting paid.

I spend my nights dreaming of being in Nepal.

And I have a series of one to three year plans, but nothing longer than that.

I think I'm crazy, so I am giving you permission to agree with me.

Crazy times, these are.

Just plain crazy.

Sunday, August 19, 2012

Sunday

"Put to death therefore what is earthly in you: sexual immorality, impurity, passion, evil desire, and covetousness, which is idolatry. On account of these the wrath of God is coming. In these you too once walked, when you were living in them. But now you must put them all away: anger, wrath, malice, slander, and obscene talk from your mouth. Do not lie to one another, seeing that you have put off the old self with its practices and have put on the new self, which is being renewed in knowledge after the image of its creator. Here there is not Greek and Jew, circumcised and uncircumcised, barbarian, Scythian, slave, free; but Christ is all, and in all."
Colossians 3:5-11
      

Saturday, August 18, 2012

A Mix of Emotions

I am lost somewhere between extreme sadness and overwhelming joy. This morning I received word that some Christian Nepali nationals have been meeting with a young girl I met when doing undercover outreach in a Kathmandu dance bar one night. I have never been SO HAPPY that God is working, and that He is ministering to a 16-year-old that needs to be taken out of the sex industry. But I have never been SO JEALOUS that I am not there being a part of that Gospel-sharing and discipling process.

Meeting Suvela and going from acquaintances to "didi"s (sisters) in a few hours that night, was an experience where I could so tangibly feel the Lord's presence in that sin-filled dance bar. After spending the evening with her, sipping on Coca-Cola and averting my eyes each time she'd have to get up and dance on the stage, I was flattened and sickened at how a girl like her is viewed. Seen as nothing more than a method of entertainment to men I wanted to punch.

The next day I handed over her contact information to Agape's staff, knowing that they would then begin to call her every week, taking her out to lunch and taking her shopping. They would begin the slow process of sharing the gospel with her, that I only played the smallest role in that night as I told her of Jesus and prayed with her.

I guess I need to remind myself that He is the only one that can save her, rescuing her from the sex industry and the exploitation of young women in Nepal.

He is at work.

I am just sad to not be there witnessing it firsthand.

E-mails will have to suffice for now.

I wanted to share with you a recap of the facets of Agape Ministries in Nepal, and some links to their various blogs that they update occasionally. This is copied from the last bit of the e-mail I received this morning.

I encourage you to read through and pray for these ministries, each of which my team and I got to partner with while we were there. Their effectiveness is so real.



CHILDREN AT RISK
We continue to minister to more than 75 kids on the streets and the slums daily.We just rented a small room as our Children at risk office.We continue to feed them,give them primary education,train them in music,play football with them and tell them bible stories on a daily basis.More than 30 of them are now going to Children's church every week that my wife and sons lead.We have rescued 18 street kids and placed them in Christian orphanages already.

WOMEN AT RISK
Our training centre continues to train more than 50 ladies daily.one girl aged 14 years who was sexually abused in an orphanage was rescued by our team and she is now going to school,having accepted Christ.
Another Girl who was married with a child was thrown out of her home after she accepted Christ.She is now taking English language and computer training amongst us.

LEADERSHIP DEVELOPMENT
Many leaders who have come to our prayer centre are now beginning to do leadership work with children and women at risk.One Pastor whom I mentored for many years has now an orphanage and a widows home.We also are giving 6 months leadership Internships to more than 10 young people who will later go as missionaries to many countries surrounding Nepal to work amongst children and women at risk.

Pray with us as we and other Leaders take the GOSPEL
to CHILDREN at RISK and WOMEN at RISK in Nepal and beyond.





Friday, August 17, 2012

My Coworkers

Remember when I told you about my various places of work? I have various coworkers at the different branches of my office, some are more familiar with me than others.

But sometimes I get a little concerned that my coworkers will judge what I do on my computer.

Like when I spend 10 minutes deciphering which of the members of One Direction is the most attractive. See for yourself. I ended up choosing Louis Tomlinson. While Kim chose Harry Styles.

Also of concern is whether my coworkers overhear "Hummingbird Heartbeat" playing through my headphones. Or "Manboy" by Eric Saade.

Or, whether they can see my screen full of this website, where you can laugh for days and days and days.

And lastly, whether they develop concern at the slides that I am constantly flipping through, filled with information on cellular mutations, cancerous tumors, and pictures of metastatic sites.

Just another rough day here at the office.

P.S. I am back in Azusa.

Holler.


Wednesday, August 15, 2012

Idea!

I have a great idea.

Let's all move to Nepal.






We can wake up to this every day.

There's nothing better.

Saturday, August 11, 2012

Study My FACE

I'm going crazy.

It is crunch time for Cancer Biology, and I have less than three weeks to freaking kick this class's a$$ or I am screwed.

Screwed, let me tell you.

In the last few weeks, I have taken to capturing self portraits of myself in various study locations.

I thought I would someday find them amusing.

In reality, they're weird, and sort of creepy.

But hey, what else is this blog for?

En-freaking-JOY!

The Bachelorette Pad

Kitchen of the Village apartment

Bedroom of the Village apartment

Living room of the Village apartment

My parent's dining room

My parent's dining room, another day...

Kaffehaus
I hate school.

And, the San Mateo Main Library. 

As you may be able to tell from the picture progression, the end is near.

Please, send help. 

And Starbucks. 

And Nepali children.

Friday, August 10, 2012

The 10th of August

I love being reminded how sovereign our God is. Amen?

I was getting dressed to head out for the evening, when I felt strongly that my night would be better spent dwelling in the scriptures and seeking the Lord in prayer.

So, I grabbed the Word and my post-Nepal journal, and sat myself on the couch, asking "Okay, Lord, where to?"

As I wrote today's date in my journal, I was reminded that a year ago I was on Walkabout, a ten-day backpacking trip through the Ansel Adams Wilderness, that is a key part of the training that APU's Residence Life puts their RA's through before each year begins. All of the RA's are broken into teams of between 8 and 12, and placed with usually two experienced guides and a medical guide, all APU-associated or friends of APU alumni or staff.


Our team set off on a long trek through the wilderness to Lake Rutherford, the most beautiful of spots, where we then spent 48 hours on "solo". This solo period is spent all on your own, with only the most basic of items, with as much water as you can pump through the filter and ONE solitary CLIF bar. We were dropped off in our solo spots after dinner on the third night of our trip, and were picked up by our guides 48 hours later. We had whistles in case of an emergency, but our guides kept a general eye on us throughout the time span, from a vista point above the lake.

I could see one of my team members in her spot across the lake, but otherwise, I was alone.

Alone at over 10,000 feet, with just a sleeping bag and mat, sleeping under the stars.

Lake Rutherford 

My spot was just to the left of this picture, right at the water's edge.

When asked, my pastor had suggested that I read through the Psalms while on Walkabout. That first night of solo found me in the seventh Psalm, as I continued into the 8th.

"When I look at your heavens, the work of your fingers, the moon and the stars, which you have set in place, what is man that you are mindful of him, and the son of man that you care for him?" Psalm 8:3-4 (ESV)

Yeah.

I mean, as can be expected, all I have written in the margin is "WOW".

In a place like Lake Rutherford, dwelling alone for 48 hours in His presence, what else can one say?

And at the end of Psalm 8?

"O Lord, our Lord, how majestic is your name in all the earth!"

I had one little pen available to me, and it's blue (uncharacteristic) ink is scratched thin in the underlining of these lines.

So as I am reading through those couple of Psalms tonight, I am made aware that that first night of solo, was August 10th, 2011.

Today? August 10th, 2012.

So much has seemingly changed. Tonight I watched the sun set from a men's slow pitch softball game instead of the tips of mountaintops, and I will soon crawl into my big bed instead of a heavily insulated sleeping bag on the rocky ground. But in the scheme of things, nothing has changed.

I am still messy, and His creation is still beautifully hand-crafted.

I am still insecure, and He is still majestic.

I am still feeling inadequate, and He is still sovereign.


Just for kicks...


And THIS is how we slept every night after our two-night solo. 
You learn to appreciate the company of believers. 
I love these individuals. 

Ten bucks if you can guess which sleeping bag is me in each picture. 
:)


Thursday, August 9, 2012

A Day at the Office

My good friend Kim and I had a running joke in the month of May, that my "office" was located across the street from my apartment complex.

At Starbucks. 

I would go and spend most of the day there with my other friends that were taking summer classes, sipping on caramel iced coffees and looking forward to Nepal. One of my teammates, Brian, and I would see each other there absolutely every day. It was reliable, it was great. 

May was one of my absolute favorite months. And I miss my office. 

To read about my roommate's love of May and our "Bachelorette Pad", head here

But for now, my office is mobile. 

I consider my office to be any Starbucks, Kaffeehaus, Coffee Bean & Tea Leaf, Intelligentsia, etc., this side of the Mississippi. 

Well not really, but any of the above in either San Mateo or Azusa is included in the list of my office branches. 

So, if in doubt, and I am unreachable by cellular device (unlikely), you can check the local caffeine establishments for my presence. 

Monday, August 6, 2012

Ben Rector

Music recommendation? 
Ben Rector. 
Anything and everything by him. 

ESPECIALLY
"You and Me" 


Even the stuff he's covered, like below. 


Brought to you by my lack of interest in studying the genetic makeup of liver cancer.

Saturday, August 4, 2012

Faces

I miss these faces. 
They are keepers. 

Asha
Her name means "Hope" in Nepali

Yabesh

Playing Karems at Peace Home

Paradise Home in Pokhara

Giggly games at One Way Home.

Muskan
Her name means "Smile" in Nepali.

Amos
They fog my thoughts daily. 
Remembering them is somewhere between joy-giving and painful. 

The Lord is doing something. 
He is continuing to break my heart, and the hearts of those around me, for a country I knew little about prior to this summer. 

And when He is doing one thing.
He is doing a million things. 

I am excited to see how these faces play into what is coming next.

Thursday, August 2, 2012

Fridays in Nepal

In Nepal I was blessed with so many great opportunities to share the gospel message, both with words and without.

My close friends know this story well already, but it is such a great summary of our whole trip, that I have to share it.

In the early mornings of the second half of the trip, a couple of us had the joy of waking up real early, walking through the quiet city streets, boarding a microbus to Jawalakhel, and taking another bus to a slum across from the Kathmandu Airport. There, we taught in a slum school from 8:30 til 10, for children who have never been, and never will go, to a proper school.

The children are anywhere from three to twelve years of age, so teaching was a struggle at times. But no matter their age, they have a hunger to learn unlike any children I have ever met. They all had been either born into that slum, or moved there from India by their parents. The children don't speak Nepali, in a country that speaks solely Nepali, but instead speak Urdu, a dialect of Hindi. Our goal as teachers, or "TEACH-AHHHH" as they called us, was to teach them a little English every day, just the basic stuff that they would be putting into use as kids.

It was rewarding beyond comprehension. Those mornings forever changed my perspective on education, and what is required with me when it comes to schooling.

Education is a responsibility that the Lord has placed in the hands of only parts of the world. What am I doing with that gift? More on that later.


The above picture is one of the days at slum school. Those two little girls in the front, Loxima and Timula, were little firecrackers. The only girls in the class, they kept the boys on their toes. We had a lot of sass in common... ;)

It was Fridays at the slum school that really bore a hole deep into me, one that will likely never be filled in, and I am thankful for it.

Fridays were shower days. We'd walk the kids over to a water pump in the corner of the slum, atop this huge concrete slab. We'd fill buckets with water, and scrub the kids down from head to toe with bars of soap and kitchen scrubbers. The water was freezing, the kids were squirmy, and the laughter abounded. It was the only shower/bathing they would get all week, as they spend their whole day after school, from 10 til around 6, begging in the temples and tourist areas of Kathmandu.

That first Friday, we had just finished washing the last of the kids, our two little girls shown above, and Kristina and I were picking up the pieces of soap and the torn apart kitchen scrubbers. We stood there for a minute in that water pump, soaked from the splashing kids, and relishing in the quiet that followed over an hour of scrubbing. From where we stood, we could see out over the entire slum, with stacked cinderblocks for walls, slanted tin roofs, and clothes hung to dry all over.

This trip to Nepal was my first experience with slums, and I was amazed by them and how they function. Or don't function. A few weeks before we took off for Nepal, the government had just bulldozed a huge slum on the river in Lalitpur, displacing over a thousand people.

It was standing there with Kristina, looking out over a place so foreign to me, that housed children I had come to love hugging, kissing, and teaching, that I drew important connections between my actions and the purpose of our trip.

Those Fridays were a physical manifestation of the Gospel message.

Scrubbing the caked-on dirt off of Hindi children in a slum of Nepal, who can't understand a word I say, before they head off to beg in Buddhist temples, is the Gospel.

Teaching English, even for an hour and a half, to Urdu-speaking children whose parents see no need to send them to school because they are more "useful" begging, is the Gospel.

It is what we are instructed to do. To care for the children, especially those who have no inheritance and no one to speak on behalf of them.

It is simple, and it is what I must do throughout the rest of this life.

Because God plucked me out of despair and scrubbed me with cold water, bars of soap, and kitchen scrubbers, even when I had no desire to know Him.

Even when I strayed far from Him, seeking my own plans and putting myself first, He took me back with grace-filled arms, bathing me in mercy and forgiveness.

I miss the Fridays. I miss them a lot.

But there are Fridays here, or the equivalent of them.

Let's find them, friends.



Wednesday, August 1, 2012

Learnings

Good morning!

I have become thankful for those that ask me, "What did you learn in Nepal?" rather than "How was Nepal?!" I have found that the first question has 100 very straightforward answers, while there is no way to answer the second without a three hour conversation.

For the first question, there are many many answers for me to choose from. And each day, there has been something new that I have only now realized I learned there.

You'd like to hear a few? Great, I'd like to write a few.

I learned that I love country music more than my heart was even aware. 

I was shown that as much as I love being on my own, I love being with people just as much. The nine others that He provided me with to travel? They are forever some of my favorites to be around, just doing life with in a completely foreign culture. 

I saw that when people are in need, there is action required of us as Christians. 

I was reminded that I love children; whether they speak only English or only Hindi, whether they go to private school or spend their days playing marbles on the streets, whether they are soft and kind-hearted, or whether they're hard and calloused. There were those whose first thought when I walked into their home was to run up and envelope me in a hug, and then make Nepali tea, coffee, or serve up the Mountain Dew. And there were those who would run up and hug me on the street, then ask if perhaps that day I had changed my mind and actually brought them the drugs and glue that they were craving. Half of the kids broke my heart into tenths, while some others would sew it back together with the testimonies of how God has changed their lives. Either way, I loved them.

But if there was one truth that will never leave me (I pray none do), it was that I saw the simplicity of the gospel message.

Christ died for the righteous and the unrighteous, the godly and the ungodly, the kids in Christian homes and those addicted to glue on the streets. He died once, and his death atoned for the sins of the world.

"For Christ also suffered once for sins, the righteous for the unrighteous, that he might bring us to God, being put to death in the flesh but made alive in the spirit" 1st Peter 3:18 (ESV)

The response? Live in light of that.

Living in light of Christ's all-atoning death on the cross changes the way I feel, and what I do, about absolutely everything. It changes how I treat my family, how I view myself and my worth, how I incorporate prayer and the Bible into each day, how I treat my friends, and how I love.

It changes each and every relationship.

Instinctively I think back on what I should have done differently in my friendships in years gone by, but Jesus doesn't open our eyes to his truths to make us feel guilty for the past. He gives us clear instruction for the future.

It changes how I view opportunities for the gospel to be put on display, and how I see the world's need for the hands and feet of Jesus.

More on that tomorrow. See you then!